With apologies to our non-English speakers we bring you…

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Simply brilliant.
h/t: PDiddy

Weeee!
h/t: Hagar email

PHOENIX (AP) - It sounds like science fiction but it’s true: A killer amoeba living in lakes enters the body through the nose and attacks the brain where it feeds until you die.
Even though encounters with the microscopic bug are extraordinarily rare, it’s killed six boys and young men this year. The spike in cases […]

#1 way to become happier:
I received a nice email inviting me to become happier. How could I say no? The short version of the story is that it is a good site and worth going to if you want to improve your level of happiness. (And who doesn’t want to do that?).
One of the questions […]

A Georgia man was beaten to death earlier today by a man with no arms, bringing the Black Knight scene in Monty Python and the Holy Grail into a whole new focus.

Humor, Monty Python

From a viral email…

h/t: Dr. Hoist

Who said sexist was out of style?

… does qsol.com really want their geek target audience associating their product with “yeah, I took out that hottie, shelled out a lot of cash, and got nothing!” Qsol = frustrating waste of time and money?

Shouldn’t qsol want sysadmins to think that their servers, um, perform?

—
Perhaps it’s a message […]

According to the Los Angeles Times,
… at least nine of the city’s 18 elected leaders used higher than average amounts of water — sometimes a little, other times a lot — over the last two years.
So, um, nine of the eighteen is half … so half were above the average … and half were […]

In the early 90s I worked at a major media company and one of the guys brought in the above tape saying that it was filmed by friends of his. We laughed so hard and kept bringing new people in to see it. Thanks to the Internet it can now be shared with all of […]

These images are from HotGhettoMess.com. They have an upcoming show on BET and for some unexplainable reason BET is getting heat for it.

Geek Squad offers a service not on the price list: free backup of your porn to a thumb drive.

One problem — the thumb drive belongs to the Geek Squad ‘agent’ fixing your computer.

The Consumerist rigged screen capture software so that it would make a video of what was going on while their computer was in […]

A concerned husband wrote to OC Register advice columnist Amy Alkron with the following problem:
A guy about 60 got friendly with her, leaving $50 tips for a few beers. This raised an eyebrow for me. Then she got breast implants and a tummy tuck and still had money … hmmm.
…
Mr. Friendly funded everything.
…
They […]

Outrage expressed over lack of credibility
Former swimsuit model, WWE Diva, and Barker’s Beauty, Lauren Jones is scheduled to begin hosting the local news in Tyler, TX as part of the new Fox reality show “Anchorwoman”. Predictably people are too stupid to recognize a good thing when they see it:

NEW YORK — An upcoming Fox […]

In an effort to reduce prostitution the government of New South Wales has given local authorities more leeway to act against illegal brothels including turning off their power and water.
There’ll be no red light over the door and it’ll be no showers and candle light at illegal brothels in NSW with the State Government planning […]

A father passing by his son’s bedroom was astonished to see the bed nicely made up and everything neat and tidy.
Then he saw an envelope propped up prominently on the pillow. It was addressed, “Dad” With the worst premonition, he opened the envelope and read the letter with trembling hands:
- - - - - […]