There is no such thing as a bad ‘women in prison’ movie

Imagine the surprise of the inmates and guards at the Hamilton County Jail when they discovered that the person booked in the case as Alexander David Cross was actually a woman also known as Elaine Ann Cross. Yep, the man they had been holding for 10 days was a chick.

They made the shocking discovery after forcing him/her to take a prison shower after 10 days of confinement. But how in Saint Peter’s name did it take 10 days to figure it out?

Didn’t they notice that the “male” prisoner…

1. Was unusually high-maintenance for a dude.
2. Always sat down to pee and bitched when the seat was left up by another prisoner.
3. Talked incessantly.
4. Knew all the teams in the WNBA.
5. Absolutely loved San Francisco.
6. Fought like a girl.
7. And didn’t smell too bad after 10 days of not showering?

The inmate was being held for statutory rape of a 15-year old girl. The young victim claimed to be as surprised as everyone else. (Note: this is pretty f’d-up for that girl who was abused by a woman pretending to be a man. Good luck coming to terms with that.)

She (he) plead guilty to the statutory rape and in exchange for the plea, she (he) will not serve jail time if she stays out of trouble for six years.

As part of the plea agreement, she (he) must register as a convicted sex offender, have no contact with the teen and change his/her gender designation on her driver’s license to female.

Hillary Swank’s famous man/woman depiction

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women in prison prison shower Elaine Ann Cross

This entry was posted on Thursday, March 29th, 2007 at 6:04 pm by Insider and is filed under Not the conventional wisdom. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.