* “You need a flash when you photograph a rabbit that already has red eyes.”
* “If you work with a jackhammer during an earthquake, stop, otherwise you are working for nothing.”
* “According to statistics, one person out of five is disturbed. If there are four people around you who seem normal, that’s not good.”
* “If you phone a psychic and she doesn’t answer the phone before it rings, hang up.”
* “In the year 3,000, people are going to speak with sound waves. Don’t think I’m crazy, the whales do it. Dolphins too.”
* “A cow eats three acres. With three acres I could make two thousand kilos of rice. With three acres I could feed Avignon!”
* “My wife is not my best sexual partner, but she’s good with the housework.”
* “A cookie has no soul, it’s just a cookie. But before it was milk and eggs. And in eggs there’s the potential for life.”
* “Showing myself nude from behind doesn’t pose any problems but from the front that’s another story. I don’t want to lose all my fans!”
* “I’m fast, why? Because I eat vegetables.”
* “Obviously I’ve taken drugs.”
* “When I walk across my living room from my chiminey to my window, it takes me ten seconds, but for a bird it takes one second, and for oxygen zero seconds!”
* “I am fascinated by air. If you remove the air from the sky, all the birds would fall to the ground. And all the planes, too.”
* “Air is beautiful, yet you cannot see it. It’s soft, yet you cannot touch it. Air is a little like my brain.”

Source: Wikipedia

This entry was posted on Saturday, January 27th, 2007 at 6:54 am by Chad and is filed under Brilliant, but uncategorizable. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.