Breast implants saves woman after Hezbollah attack – US Military mandates for all service members
BREITBART.COM – Breast implants saves woman after Hezbollah attack
Still stinging from rebukes over the shortage of body armor and up armored HumVees, and anxious to avoid the appearance of not providing the best possible protection to our service members overseas, the US Military announced a program of mandatory breast implants for all personnel.
The program is based on feedback from the recent Israeli / Hezbollah conflict in which an Israeli woman’s implants stopped shrapnel from a Hezbollah rocket attack (Hezbollah routinely fires rockets into civilian areas).
Speaking under a promise of anonymity a military official stated, “I’m not looking forward to this they [the implants] are ginourmous. But there is no way we are going to let Hillary come at us with the charge we aren’t doing our best to provide personal protective gear again.”
Troops in the field have mixed reactions to the program. Sgt. Ben Dover expresses doubts about the effectiveness, “The immediate reaction is always to pile on more armor no matter how hot and uncomfortable it may be. Never mind if it restricts mobility. This is just more of the same”. “Still”, he said staring away, “It may cut down on the boredom.”
The future of the US Military?
h/t Ace
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August 15th, 2006 at 9:21 pm
This post is truly magical. Hopefully it will play at least a small part in finally resolving decades of strife and conflict in the Middle East.
August 16th, 2006 at 4:34 pm
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