(source, source, and source)
Desperate to slow down declining Barbie sales, Mattel has taken a giant step toward Sex-Toy Barbie with the introduction of “Pin-Up Barbie.”

The first doll in the line, Way Out West Barbie, features Barbie in short-shorts, leather boots, and brandishing a whip (they call it a “lariat” but they’re not fooling anyone).

Next will come Hula Barbie, where a rumor started here says she’ll ask “would you like to play with my coconuts?”

Finally, we’ll see Lady Luck Barbie — a washed up lounge singer looking to entertain some male clients in private.

That’s what we see, anyway. Mattel says they’re hoping the line appeals to older female collectors.

Barbie sales are in decline due to competition from cooler dolls (like Bratz) — “cooler” according to six year olds, that is — and the perception among young girls that Barbie’s an older woman or authority figure — like Mom. And what six year old wants to spend play time with Mom?

—
The Orange County Register wondered if Barbie was having a midlife crisis, and some folks played along:

Eighty careers by midlife shows a lack of focus, says Ann Coil of Santa Ana-based Coil and Associates. …”Although job portability is not a stigma like it once was, she carries it to an extreme.”

Financial planner Lisa Tatman assumes Barbie has been smart enough to keep her Malibu condo (1971) and vintage 1981 Corvette. … But concerned about her potential union with Ken – “a Mattel scam to earn new sales off of Barbie dowry items?” – Tatman anxiously advises a pre-nup agreement to protect the condo, convertible and other savings.

(According to life coach Loz Barbour) “Barbie should spend more time with women her own age; perhaps join a book club or start a WomanSage chapter in Malibu. … Barbie needs to spend time with a certified professional life coach to gain a balance between consumerism and self-reflection.”

This entry was posted on Tuesday, July 11th, 2006 at 11:50 am by A Senior Administration Official and is filed under Funny ... to us. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.