The FBI announced last night they had indicted seven Miami area men for a terrorist plot to blow up the Sears Tower as well as several government buildings.

The seven would be jihadis were apparently living in a warehouse and were described by neighbors as seemingly brainwashed and militaristic but non-threatening, although one neighbor stated, “It seemed like a military boot camp that they were working on there. They would come out and stand guard.”

After setting up their encampment the alleged terrorists made contact with an FBI agent they believed to be a member of Al-Qaeda and requested assistance in their mission to “Kill all the devils we can” in a mission that would be, “be just as good or greater than 9/11,’ beginning with the destruction of the Sears Tower.” They had the agent administer the Oath of Allegiance to Al-Qaeda to them, and requested material support including $5000, machine guns, and uniforms.

While this incident and the recent arrests of alleged terrorists in Canada indicate the need for continued vigilance it was fortunately interrupted. I am just glad that the wannabe Al-Qaeda members obviously had not read the Rules for the Evil Overlord, since I can think of at least 4 general rules they violated:

I will always dress in bright, cheery colors… Mostly soft pastels. Wearing nothing but black is too depressing, while wearing all white is too boring.

While deformed mutants and oddball psychotics will certainly have their place in my Legions of Terror, I will not send them out on missions that require tact or subtlety.

If they were familiar with the above rules they could have derived the following:

Setting up a bootcamp in the middle of a major metropolitan area attracts unwanted attention.

Any stranger who approaches you claiming to be a representative of an international terrorist organization is an FBI agent.

This entry was posted on Friday, June 23rd, 2006 at 11:12 am by Chad and is filed under Brilliant, but uncategorizable. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.